怎樣幫助臨終的人 How to help a dying person

第十七世大寶法王聽列泰耶多傑 – 對信眾問題的回應 – 2013.11.01

問題:

法王陛下,請問對著因癌症臨終的母親,我應該說什麼,和怎樣幫忙?

聖者大寶法王的回答:

在這種困難情況,無論是癌症,還是其他疾病,我相信只能提供一樣東西。其實,我們不單可以在困苦時提供這東西,還可以在平常提供。這是什麼?它是我們內藏的品質。

在閣下的情況裡,精神支持是無價的。它是最好的,比任何其他物件都更珍貴。在這時刻,任何了不起的物質也沒用。在這時刻,任何權利、名譽、財富都無所謂了。但簡單的精神支持,便非常受用。它是一切。尤其這種支持來自親友,更加容易受落。
當然有些情況,當一個陌生人給予支持,也會有幫助。但在閣下的情況,最好是用時間及精力去給予精神上的支持。就算有困難,也要在病人面前表現你是妥當、堅強和自信,這是有利的。要以言語及行動表現對各樣事情也有信心。

我想,有些情況,病人或許會復原。就算不能復原,他們也能以較平和的心情走過這段路。

是。在這些是佛法能給予的幫助。

His Holiness Karmapa Thaye Dorje responds to disciple’s question – 1.11.2013

Question:
• Your Holiness, what to say and how to help my Mum who is dying of cancer?

His Holiness Karmapa Thaye Dorje’s response:

‘I believe that when anyone is in this kind of condition – be it cancer or any other form of illness – in these difficult moments, I think there is only one thing that we can provide. In fact, we can provide this, not just during difficult times, but also when things are seemingly alright. What is this thing? Our countless inner qualities.

Now, in this case, providing emotional support is priceless. It is the best – there is nothing of greater value. At such a moment, whatever amazing things we can provide materialistically, will not help at all. At such a moment, power, fame, material wealth doesn’t matter – instead that simple gesture of emotional support goes a long way. It is everything. This is particularly true when it comes from someone whom you know, for it is easier for the recipient to accept.

There are cases, of course, when a stranger gives that kind of support, and this also helps. However, in the case of the person asking the question, I think the best thing you can offer is the time and energy to give emotional support. Even if it is challenging, it may be beneficial for you to appear and express in front of the patient that you are alright; that you are strong and you are confident – confident that everything will be alright – and then of course also express this through verbal and physical gestures.

And then I think there are some cases where the patient may become cured. But even if they don’t, at least they will be able to go through that journey in a much more peaceful manner.

Yes, these are the things that the Buddha dharma can always provide.’